August 26,
2019
God’s
Got This One
It’s been
awhile since I’ve written. Sometimes there are just no words. Sometimes all
that rests on this side of heaven is a heart full of prayers for comfort or a
general daze, along with a soaking in reality.
The past
couple of weeks, Cherie took a well needed vacation up in the pines of AZ. My
parents took her to a cabin, where she got to spend time with some close
friends that came up to visit with her. And Cherie did get a couple days to
herself, all alone…something she hasn’t had since last December! She filled her
days in the mountains with lots of rest and sleep. She was also getting used to
some new pain medicine that seemed to mostly do the trick. At one point she took
a 2 mile walk with a friend and enjoyed every minute of it. When she wasn’t
with her friends she slept…she LOVES her sleep!
It’s been
about 6 weeks now that Cherie has been experiencing pain…it’s a pain that comes
with cancer, somewhere inside her abdomen area, but nothing succinct, just
general pain. Sometimes it’s just an annoying sloshy tummy feeling. Sometimes
it hurts enough for me to hear it in her voice. Those times are more often now.
Those times are daily. But God’s got this one.
God has
truly blessed Cherie with a palliative care doctor that has been sweet,
sympathetic, and straight forward. She has given Cherie her personal cell phone
number so they can work together to figure out what meds are helpful. In the
past month Cherie was experiencing extreme pain and went to the ER, where they
performed a CT scan. The things that showed up in that scan are indicators of
why the palliative doctor has encouraged Cherie to pursue hospice care. The
doctor also told Cherie that she should be eating things and doing things that
make her feel good. After that appointment, we all went out for Chick Fil A and
picked up some amazing Chocolate Ganache ice cream! God’s got this one!
But the pain
and uncomfortableness have been a lurking issue. The appetite to eat is just
not there. The doctor has helped to find the right combination of meds that
will give Cherie some relief, but she has continued to point Cherie in the
direction of hospice care. This week Cherie, mom, dad, and I will meet with
hospice. I am eager to see how they can help Cherie with her pain. Since she
has chosen not to receive chemo treatment, hospice will be there to make sure
she is living as comfortably as possible.
I am thankful for those of you who have helped encourage her to pursue
learning more about what hospice can do to help her. I am a huge proponent of
this pursuit, since it has been a struggle to see Cherie deal with pain
everyday now. And God’s got this one.
We still
have been given no timeline as to how much time my sister still has on this
earth. And then I stop to think: Has anyone really truly been given a timeline
for our short stay on this earth?! This
cancer thing just starts to tug at the heart and we all want to know what to
expect. It’s difficult. It’s not difficult to recognize that our earthly bodies
are in God’s Sovereign hands, but when the reality of cancer hits, along with
the suffering effects, this is when I struggle with a known situation that I
can’t control. But then I sit at the feet of my Beloved Savior and rest in
peace, accepting my helplessness, feeling that humbleness which comes with the
acknowledgement that my hands are weak, my efforts to control are feeble. God’s
got this one.
There are no
rose colored glasses for this entry. The cancer is growing. It’s hard to watch.
We thank God
for:
-
The
time away that Cherie had in the AZ pines!
-
The
friends God has placed in her life that have truly been an encouragement
-
The
health of my parents, who have been steady providers for Cherie in ways we can
never try to count
-
Giving
man the idea for medication that was invented that will help smooth this time
ahead
-
Flowers.
She still loves flowers. A single flower or a beautiful bouquet will always
brighten her day
Please pray
for:
-
A
quick transition to hospice care. We want Cherie to enjoy her days and have
more good days than pain filled ones
-
Stamina
for Cherie on her good days
-
Cherie
to have a heart of peace as she opens her mind to even the word “hospice” and
the reality she faces
-
My
mom and dad. They will need energy and stamina as things progress
